Archive for May, 2014



May 19, 2014

I dunno….but it’s been a while.

Quite a number of people have asked why I’ve been away.

It’s pretty simple.

I’ve been happy!! *Cue Pharrell’s Happy”

The world has been good to me lately….

……or maybe to you because NONE of you have pissed me off enough to drag me here.

But since I’m writing now, you know what it means.

Someone’s crossed me.

Someone’s given all of us a reason to sing! LOL!

Enough faffing about already…..

Let’s get this ball rolling.

So in March 2013, I made the bold decision to chop off my relaxed hair and grow my tresses out naturally.

I say BOLD because a lot of us black women still haven’t been able to embrace our kinky coils.

The black cotton which makes us different from the rest of the world’s races…..

…our uniqueness. (Aside our skin colour of course)

No I’m not judging any woman with relaxed hair.

I remember how quickly I would slather the creamy crack on my new growth when I had relaxed hair!

Gosh! Sometimes I miss having straight hair.

Hair that lies flat when it comes in contact with water.

My kinky hair…well…it comes alive when it ‘sees’ water!

It’s like a party on my head.

I’m deviating…as usual.

So yeah…I chopped off my hair.

Now the most interesting thing about going natural has not been my discovery of how absolutely beautiful and versatile the hair I was born with is….


It’s been the reactions I get from people when they realize my hair is unprocessed.

Virgin hair.

That I must say, has been quite a huge part of my journey.

Sometime last year, after the big chop….

….I met a guy.

Black guy.

When I say black, I’m not only talking about race.

No! No! No!

BLACK guy!

Let me just add here that after having relaxed hair for over 10 years it was difficult to accept my face without hair.

So as soon as I chopped it off, I found some fake hair and stuck it on.

The confidence I lost from the big chop returned AS soon as the fake hair was back….

…framing my face…..

Making me look like a woman again….

… defined by magazines….

…the “beauty experts”…

….everyday people…

..and our very selves!

I fit the accepted definition of beauty again.

I had hair!

Am I deviating again?

So I met this guy when I had my confidence hat on. (My weave)

Obviously this was accepted so he was accepting.

The day this man saw my real hair!



I’m even laughing as I type!

He opened his mouth and asked …

…..“Why you got Nigger hair?!”


Uncle Ruckus!

Nigger hair?

I looked at him long and hard.

Trying to figure out if he had missed my skin colour.

Last I checked I was black.

That stuff grows out of our heads.

The Nigger Hair that is.

So I asked him….

“Why do you hate yourself?”

He looked at me completely puzzled.

Suffice to say, my interaction with this person ended.

You see…

…if an obroni man had made such an utterance….I would have understood kakra.(I said kakra oooh!)

But my fellow brotha !*hold your fist up revolution style*

The many years of seeing our women with relaxed and “woven hair” seems to have confused some of our men.

He isn’t the only one to have commented on my natural locks.


He was the only one who boldly and ignorantly made a racist comment against his own race….(Yes this is possible)

I’ve heard comments like…

“aden? Perming cream asa?” (why? Is perming cream no longer in existence?”

“na woti no wo ntwi”” (won’t you relax your hair??”)

BUT you see

I’ve also heard good although funny comments…

…my good friend Allen  can’t get enough of my natural coiffe.

 Kuuku calls my signature do a Baobab tree…affectionately.

Heck! My friend Kay says I’m a sexy Sideshow Bob. LOL!

My Obroni friends CANNOT keep their hands to themselves when I’m near. (erm…their hands are in my hair pls. Get your minds outta the gutter!)

I’m not sure that I want to relax my hair anytime soon.

I’m enjoying the freedom my hair gives me.

  1. I can go swimming without worrying about my hair getting wet.
  2. Cost of maintenance has been lowered significantly. (And I mean significantly! Ewurade!!!!)
  3. I love the attention and the looks of puure admiration I get from my fellow sistas* hold your fist up revolution style*(these same sistas would then say things like….”oh it’s nice because your hair is nice. My hair dieh! Kpenkpeshie!”  Sista please if you do it, your own will be nice too wai. )
  4. I love how heat appliances are a thing of the past. Curlers. Blowdriers. Straightners! GONE!

It’s been a beautiful journey! (don’t get me wrong…I like to rock my confidence hat occasionally)

A sensible decision…..

One I wish I had made earlier.

So all you Uncle(and Auntie) Ruckuses out there….

….I beg you…

If you can’t accept my blackness….

…I can’t accept your ignorance.

Or is it preference?


Dedicated to my nappy headed sisters ……Alexandra, Judith and Priscilla

And to my Brother-in-Law, Aaron,  who gave me so much grief about not writing I HAD to put this down!