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THEY NEVER CAME….

May 9, 2012

So…
…I’ve had a long hiatus from sharing the little things that make my life so worth it!
This is simply because I discovered my inner “nice”….
….so a lotta things don’t piss me off as much.
Ok I lied.
I’m still rather easily piss off-able and the incident I’m about to share with you guys made me realize that I’ve still got it!!! (Thank God)
I left work early yesterday because I wasn’t feeling too good.
Just as I pulled up to my gate, I noticed two cars had double parked in a way that made it almost impossible to get into my own house.
One of the cars was literally parked in front of my gate and the other was parked across the road, right in front of my house.
If any of you know where I live, you will understand how narrow this then makes the road.
Let me also mention at this point that I live very close to the Central University…..
….so these cars belonged to their dim-witted students.
The bane of my existence, these bloody students!
This is something they do all the time….
…parking anywhere, anyhow and its extremely irritating because coming home is an absolute nuisance.
There have been times where I’ve had to abandon my intended route……
…… even if it meant I was literally a second away from my house……
….. to use another…….
…. because of these stupid students!
When I finally managed to get into a position that made getting into the house easy……
….I rummaged around my bag for a piece of paper and a pen…..
….and began to write a note.
At this point, considering my frustration,
I considered writing a very nasty note but I thought about it and opted for something a little more polite.
After all we all make mistakes and this genuinely might have been the first time that this person has parked here. (But today was not their lucky day kwraaaa cuz shit was about to get real)
I wrote down the following:
Pls do not park so close to my gate in the future.
Thanks.

Very polite, no?
This note was placed lovingly on the windshield of this car.
I mean will you get???!
I drove into my house…..
…with a lighter heart because i felt like i had done something good for my community.
Yes my whole community was going to benefit from this act.
Once I got into the house, I asked my dad if he had seen how close to the gate the students were parked.
He had and was not amused at all!!!
He was muttering all sorts of nothings because by the time he had gone on his rant, I was walking away.
I mean I understood his anger.
My dad usually comes home early and when he does, he spends a lot of his time in the kitchen.
He was cooking dinner when I got home for himself and my mum because I rarely eat when I get home.
Now it was my mum’s turn to come home.
She just found it impossible to turn into the house….
…..so Superman Daddy had to go and help her.
Eventually they got the car into the house and all was right with the world. Again. For the 3rd time that day.
We were all chilling; parents eating their dinner, me sorting out my clothes because my dad is doing some donation to some kids in Aburi this weekend……
…..when the bell rang!
My dad was the first to abandon his food and go outside to see who it was.
I followed….
….because I knew what this was about……
……and I was looking forward to meeting the fuckwit who owned the car.
Now here’s where the mess started.
This girl who rang the bell…
…not a very good looking one too if i might add…..
….stood in front of my house and accused my father of letting the air out of her tyres because the security man on street patrol said they had seem him do it and leave a note on her windshield.
I just got mad!
I was like ‘Whaaaaaat????’
Like seriously what the fuck are you on?
What have you been drinking?
You AND the security man!
How about apologizing for being such a bloody nuisance instead of launching into attack? How about that?
So this girl starts to shout all sorts of Twinglish words and phrases at my dad.
I’m there and I’m getting upset.
My dad just waits for her to finish, then he says:
Thank you.
This is why I always say, this University right here is a syto University.
You’ve just proven it.
You can barely speak a full English sentence.
It doesn’t matter what grades you make, they clearly will enroll anyone

Noooor this girl vex!
She starts to shout more Twinglish words and this time she’s managed to reel in a few more ugly girls.
Mooooore ugly girls at my gate.
I had never seen so many ugly women in one place before.
It was phenomenal.
The one who owned the car across the street had also suffered the wrath of the “area people”…
…..and two of her tyres had had the air let out!
Mobo!
I wasn’t feeling too sorry for them because I thought….
…..this was simple reasoning.
It was evident that where you had parked want the best but noooooooo…….
You went ahead and deposited your jalopy right there.
Some beat up old Benz too.
And this girl was angry!!!!
And fat!
And she was wearing yellow.
Bright yellow.
Big Bird on Sesame Street!
My Street.
These girls started throwing stones into my house.
Like savages.
A group of ugly savages.
At this point my parents called the police.
My parents m’ome sometimes they forget where they live eh?
This was my mother:
We have a situation at house number xxx and we need a patrol team to come and sort this out
I swear the police were just humouring her because they said they were on their way.
My dad was also on the phone to the head of some police station asking for a team.
Instead of looking for some Nima boys….
….you’re calling the police!
Ghana Police?!!
When will they come?
They forgot so soon the situation with my stolen car!
Kai!
Anyways…..
The police said they were on their way…(LIES!!!!)
…so we moved the cars out of the driveway, into the garage because of the stones and quietly went into our house.
Then the bell rang again.
And again.
And again.
It was the fatty. In yellow. Big Bird.
Doing it to piss us off.
I went outside….
…after my dad had warned me not to.
At this point I was livid.
I asked them what their problem was.
The fatty starts to shout all sorts of Twinglish words then she ended it with “Stewpid Girl”
Ei!!!!!!!
Me m’ome!
Saa?
Ok.
I waited till she was done and said to her.
I’m so glad I’m not as angry as you are.
Otherwise I’ll be fat.
You eat because you’re angry…CLEARLY! My dad just cooked, would you like some food Chubby McChubson???

Ooooh the girl vex.
As I was walking away,
I felt a gust of wind go by my legs.
This yellow top fatty was HURLING rocks into my yard.
Not stones ooh!
ROCKS!!!
The girl could HURL A ROCK!
Ewurade!
One of her rocks hit my foot and my father just died!( I finally had a wound from this battle!!!)
At that point I thought he was going to smash the girl’s windscreen.
He was livid!
My mum, being the voice of reason just asked us to write down their car numbers so we make a formal complaint to the school.
It was all so ridiculous.
The bush Cental girls were just something else.
I mean I’ve always had very little respect for the school but this incident just put them on a totally different level.
Any respect I had completely evaporated!
All gone.
I went into my house with my parents quietly and waited for the police….
…Needless to say…
…..They never came.

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PING ME AND DIE!

July 1, 2011

Ok! Let me just put this out there. I do NOT understand people who call you back to back.
More like people who call ME back to back….
….like calling me 15 times will make a difference!
If I don’t want to talk, I don’t want to talk…….
……or perhaps I’m busy. Did you think of that?
Or that I know what trivial issue you’re about to yap down my phone and since I’m NOT interested I’m ignoring you.
It is FUCKING irritating when you call me back to back….
….. with no breather in between!
It really is.
Unless it’s urgent, don’t do it.
And what is up with those people who try to get your attention with a PING!?
What is that?
Seriously! What IS that?
Unless you sent me a message earlier (an important one at that)….
….and didn’t get a response (after an hour)…
You have no fucking right to attack me with a PING!
Its hella annoying.
Fucktard: PING!
Fucktard: PING!
Fucktard: PING!
Me: What?!!???!!!
Fucktard: What’s up?
Me: *insert straight face here*
Unless we play like that, don’t ping my phone like a mad person wai!
PLEASE!
Now that that rant is over, how about we talk about men…..and food…
….how about that?

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HOW’RE YOU GUYS? IT’S BEEN A WHILE!

June 5, 2011

I’ve gotten to a point in my life where a lotta people I grew up with are giving up their lives.
By giving up their lives i mean getting married.(no I’m not bitter….)
Somehow, that has become MY personal nightmare.
Now you know how it is….
…once you hit a certain age….
….once people your age group tie the proverbial knot, settle and start producing,
You’re automatically expected to do same.
Now my dilemma reached a crescendo in April this year.
My favourite cousin got married…..to the most wonderful man even I have ever met.
One of a kind.
Last of a dying breed in fact.
She decided to be the first one in our age group(amongst the cousins) to get married and now every time family gets together all i hear is…..
….”when should we expect the invitation?”
To what?
I mean seriously is that how we just get up and send invitations???
If it’s an invitation you want i can send you one m’ome.
Doesn’t necessarily have to be to any event….
….just a blank invitation card will do anaa?
It’s ridiculous how much these old folk impose the marriage thing on you.
I can’t even bring a guy home without it bearing some hidden meaning.
I mean imagine…..
…..if I was a guy and came to visit me and was exposed to “these conditions”, I just might run the other way (I’m just saying)
The same rate at which people are getting married, they are getting separated.
Fall in love, after six months decide you want to be together forever.
Let me remind you that forever is a fucking long time…..
…and if a year into your forever you decide…
“I don’t like the way my husband/wife chews her food” (yes petty things like this irritate me),
“I can’t sleep at night cuz he sounds like the whole London Underground”
Or worse……
….”Fuck me! This bitch can’t cook for shit”
Then what?????
Split up….
…..find another 6month lover and start again?
I’ll pass on this one thanks.
You see,
In my mind I have an ideal situation planned.
It may not pan out exactly as I want it to but certain scenarios are definitely out of the question.
No, i’m not gonna marry you and move to your parent’s house.
To the room that you’ve been sleeping in since you were six.
I’m not moving out of the room I’VE been sleeping in since I was six to move into yours.
See where I’m going?
God forbid if we have a child on the way.
My child will turn six in the room you’ve been sleeping in since you were six.
Marriage isn’t a joke at all.
Especially in this era and I wish our parents understood that.
Our generation will not suck it up and deal with it if it’s not going well.
We’re changing partners like our weaves….or shoes….or underwear or something, I dunno, I’m talking from a female’s POV (yes….I said it Amet! Bite me!)
If I decide to listen to these old people and find someone to settle with just because…
…….booooooy i’m pretty sure I’m gonna be one unhappy princess….
….and the guy will probably be too.
Just as I think it’ll be hard to live with someone…..
…..in the same room…
….in the same bed for the rest of my life….
…I’m pretty darned sure I will NOT be an easy person to live too.
I have flaws. (Oh! Did I just burst your bubble? Ok I lied. I’m hella perfect)
It’s not something I’m gonna do just because it’s “time”
Or because, as someone so poetically said to me……..
“your biological clock is ticking and your ovaries are drying up”
When it’s time I’ll know.
And it will happen…..
With all the pomp and pageantry .
So with this out of the way….
…How’re you guys? It’s been a while!

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HOW FAR IS TOO FAR?…..

April 1, 2011

I’m gonna jump right into this one today because basically i have so much pent up anger and rage in my being I need to vent.
I bet most of you saw that video today.
The video that violated one human being’s fundamental human rights in more than 1000 ways.
My girlfriend watched it and mentioned a few of us along with the Facebook link on Twitter this morning.
I did not click on the link initially because I thought….
……“oh it’s just one of those things!”
Besides it IS April Fool’s day today and I sure as hell wasn’t falling for any of that foolishness.
As the day progressed i noticed a bunch of people tweeting comments on the video…..
….so I figured….
…what the hell!
Grabbed my computer, searched for my girl’s earlier tweet and clicked on the link.
After the first few seconds I was yawning and thinking….
…….“How is this even remotely heartbreaking?”
Some girl in a dress, a few bruises,bunch of guys making noise…
..no drama!
I was about to shut it off when the real mess started.
These guys started to rip the girl’s clothes off!
At that point I was like “what the flying fuck is going on here?”
They continued to strip her till she was completely naked.
The guys grabbed her legs and pried then open to expose her vagina to the camera….
She’s tried frantically to cover her breasts and vagina but these guys were pulling her from every angle making it virtually impossible.
The guys yanked her hands away from her private parts.
Her efforts to save what was left of her dignity proved futile.
This girl…..
….pretty girl….
….was struggling to break free amidst tears.
She looked tired.
Worn out.
But these guys were relentless.
At some point in the video it looked like someone was poking and prodding her vagina.
If you didn’t see the video…..
….i wonder how just reading this makes you feel.
I was absolutely livid watching it.
The kind of anger that my heart let out was beyond my own comprehension.
I don’t think I have felt anything this intense in years.
Now the story behind this whole video I do not know for sure.
I heard three different ones and I’m not sure which is an actual fact.
Story one: This girl was a thief the police had been looking for, for a long time.
Story two:This girl had stolen a laptop and a bunch of other items.
Story three: She took her friend’s laptop from her room without her permission. So when this friend came to find that her laptop was nowhere to be found, she panicked. She then found the laptop in the girl’s room and started calling her a thief.

To be very honest.
I don’t give a rat’s ass what this girl’s crime was so much.
I know it has something to do with stealing.
My issue here is how people who are supposed to be in a higher learning institution could be so primitive in their method of punishment.
How men who have mothers and sisters could treat a woman this way.
Yes she stole something…
…..but what right have you to violate her in this manner?
Who made you God?
Fuck that!
God would not humiliate any of his creations in this way.
No way, no how!
This video spun several arguments on Facebook,Twitter and in my office.
A lot of them very juvenile and ignorant.
No surprise here.
So many ignorant fucktards on Facebook anyway…
I speak purely from a personal point of view and if you cannot deal with it….
…please don’t fucking read my blog.
I am pissed.
The anger surging through me as I write this is the kinda anger that drives people to act the fool.
Yes.
I am pissed.
Absolutely livid!
University of Ghana.
Ghana’s premiere university?
My ass!

The men who did this are people who are going to complete their ‘higher education”…..
….and blend with people in the system.
These psychopaths….
…these animals.
Their actions towards this girl was NOT human.
No person with a soul….
….or with a conscience would do that to anyone.
No one.
Some dumb fuck opened their mouth and made a statement that made me want to slap them into oblivion.
This person said that when guys who steal in Legon are caught,
The girls enjoy watching them get stripped and ponded.

If you watched the video,
Did you see any girls stripping this chick?
Did you?

How the fuck is that even an argument?
These were guys.
All stronger than she will ever be.
Grabbing her in places that no stranger should.
If you’re a guy reading this and you think I’m being dramatic…..
…or that I’m over-reacting….
Imagine you mother, aunt, sister or female cousin……
…..even your grandmother being violated in this way.

Sure they’ll say they didn’t rape her. Oh! They just stripped her!
But I swear this was worse than rape.
The girl will be traumatized for the rest of her life.

Karma is a bitch guys.
It truly is.

You don’t want the shit you do…..
….especially to someone’s daughter to come back a few years to bite you in the ass.

Yes she stole something.
But Lord knows she did not deserve what they did to her.
You know what killed me?
Some of the men in that video looked to me like they were mature students.
I’ll bet they have wives…..
….perhaps girlfriend.
…ooooh! You do not know that evil things going through my head right now.
No this isn’t my usual funny, quirky blog piece.
This shit hit me.
It tore my heart to pieces…..
If you watched it and didn’t feel anything….
…I’m not sure what you are.
I truly am not.
Yes I have taken it very personal.
I am a woman and watching that shit made me realize that there is evil in men’s hearts.
I bet you anything they stripped her just to satisfy their own perverted desires.
What the flying fuck has her vagina got to do with the situation at hand.
Forcing her legs open like that.
Say what you want…..
..but those guys….
….all those guys raped that girl when they violated her like that.
They did……
…..and in my opinion that is even more criminal than whatever that girl did to warrant that treatment.
But karma is gonna come.
And it will bite you in the ass many times over.
Maybe not today.
Maybe not tomorrow.
But it surely will come.
And the beauty of it for me is I realized how truly ignorant some people are today.
LOL-ing the video and basically making basic comments like how she shaved real nice.
Someone on my Blackberry said something about why she was going round stealing when clearly she could afford a Brazillian wax.
Damn shame because every single one of you has a mother.
And if you have love for you mother…
If you have respect for you mother…
You will NEVER treat a woman that way.
It is NOT funny…
At all…..
….and I must say I lost a lotta respect for certain people today.
You cannot begin to justify this nonsense.
This shit is happening in Universities.
Higher learning.

You would expect these people to know better.
You would expect these people to be able to ask themselves,
How Far Is Too Far?
I guess that’s asking too much.

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WWLD

March 14, 2011

So I was just sitting at my desk ….
….minding my own business you know.
Listening to Adele and trying to get shit done.
Out of the corner of my eye I see a flashing red light.
I look up from the work I am so deeply engrossed in…
…and realize the persistent red light is my Blackberry……
NEW MESSAGE!!
Happy !Happy! Joy! Joy! ( you know that inexplicable excitement when u get a new message)
Anyway so I take a break from what I’m busy typing…
…. to open this NEW MESSAGE I’m so excited about…..
…and this is the foolishness that greeted me,
on this beautiful yet uninspiring day.
“If you love the devil close this txt.
If you love God & glad he woke u up today.
Send this to all ur contacts.”

First of all gasp at the obvious grammatical error….
….as well as punctuation faux pas.
I mean IF YOU absolutely MUST send me a broadcast….
…correct it so it is pleasing to my eye…(yes my eye)
…BEFORE you hit the damn send button!
Five seconds after my mental expression of utter disgust at the sender’s inability to spot the error,
the reality of the situation hit me and I thought…
…HOW ABSOLUTELY 1st grade!
Class 1!
SYfuckingTO ( Syto) that message was!
I mean COME ON!
When did Christianity/ Faith/ Religion/ God become so radical??
When did it come to this?
“If you love the Devil?”
REALLY?
Damn you for threatening me with that message.
I love BBM.
I think it’s a wonderful way to connect with people.
It has helped me paaa in life because I am terrible at keeping in touch……
……but the blatant display of ignorance via this wonderful piece of technology is disturbing.
First of all…
…are you trying to convert me?
Are you trying to get me to say thanks to the Lord?
Are you trying to ascertain whether or not I’m a devil worshipper?
Do tell me.
What the fuck are you trying to achieve with this very basic message you just sent me?
And these things go round like fucking viruses.
One ignorant person sends it and the rest follow.
If you’re reading this and you’ve sent this message to anyone today….
…kindly do me a favour and slap yourself.
Have you done it?
Thank you.
Guilt tripping people to act “Holy” is NOT the way to go.
Some dumb ass people will feel bad and copy and paste(and ignore all the grammatical errors)
And send to all their contacts….(Muslims and Buddhists included if your contact list is as diverse as mine is)
And instead of the recipient (me) acknowledging that indeed…
…”Jesus is Lord”….
….you end up just pissing people (like me) off with your juvenile intro…
…”If you love the devil…”
Pure fuckery!
I don’t get why people try so desperately to prove their level of piety to other fellow human beings.
Why do u assume you’ll go to heaven any faster if you (allow yourself to be guilt tripped to) send some broadcast.
I didn’t get the memo that God had changed his modus operandi.
Now I’m sure some of you over pious people are gasping and going…
“Forgive her Father for she knows not what she is doing”
I won’t come on here and impose my beliefs of anyone….
…so in the same way I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t either.
Thank you. (my piece titled YE WHO HATH NOT SINNED will shed more light on my stance on this issue)
And it’s not just the messages about loving the devil and hating God.
It’s stupid games like this one…..
WARNING: YOU MIGHT BECOME MORE STUPID AFTER READING THE FOLLOWING FEW LINES.
EXTRA DUMB PEOPLE SHOULD OPEN WIKIPEDIA AND READ SOMETHING SMART RIGHT AFTER VIEWING THIS.
…..here goes…
“We are playing a game.
Someone proposed that we GIRLS do something special to help with Breast Cancer Awareness.
It’s easy, and I’d like you to join us help it spread.
Last year it was about writing the colour of the bra that you were wearing in your status and it left men wondering for days why the girls had random colours as their status.
This year it has to do with your relationship status.
You will state where you are by posting one of the codes below.
Blueberry: I’m single
Pineapple: It’s complicated
Raspberry: I’m a touch and go woman
Apple: Engaged
Cherry: In a relationship
Banana: I’m married
Avocado: I’m the other one
Strawberry: Can’t find the right one
Lemon: Wish I was single
Grape: Want to get married”

Instantly you realize how absolutely retarded this game is.
First of all….
…why don’t you just put up an actual BREAST CANCER related message as your status message if you’re so genuinely adamant about supporting the cause.
How will my fucking (fruit)relationship status aid in BREAST CANCER awareness?
My fruit status is highly irrelevant!
Nonsense!!!
The dominance of ignorance!
Some people just broadcast anything.
“The world is coming to an end on the 21st of October 2011”
Then you too you broadcast.
I’m not the biggest Christian in the world but I KNOW THAT…
NO ONE!
Absolutely NO ONE knows when the Lord is coming so quit sending us predictions.
This is not a Predict and Win by Tigo or whoever
And those who never say hi…..
NEVER EVER!
…. then suddenly get up one day …
and decide that they deserve the rights to sending you a (foolish)broadcast message annoy me the most!
Gosh!
Today I have talked!
But basically I’m just saying…..
I don’t like dumb ass broadcasts.
So before you send them….
AT ALL!
…I beg…
…Gauge the stupidity or ignorance level….
…and try to figure out…
What Would Lorraine Do?

Dedicated to Breyeda Kwame who sends me the best broadcasts on earth.
Much love!

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A CESSPIT OF WORDS THAT MAKE SENSE

March 7, 2011

The last post (which was last night by the way) received a lot of views.
I’m guessing my rants were your exact same sentiments????
Weird because I received 5oo+ views and only ONE person admitted to actually using the abbreviation HBD (lets all clap for this guy whose name I will not mention)
As I said before….
This is solely MY opinion.
Its isn’t the ultimate (of course it is! No it really isn’t…just kidding)
….so you may continue using it I won’t judge you
No….
…no this is not a sequel to my last blog piece.
It was, however, Twitter and Facebook inspired.
Don’t you guys just love these social media sites right now?
I know Vanessa, Riya and Kobby probably do….
…the pressure I get alone!
Good pressure.
From my last rant I discovered that people (some) do not appreciate my potty mouth….
…unfortunately…
…if you know me personally, you’ll realize I write like I speak.
I don’t particularly mince my words…
…. and when I feel like I need to express myself appropriately (this might be a pure juxtaposition)
I cuss.
Should I apologize?
No!
Did you apologize to me for stammering?
Or having a lisp?
No!
I also have a speech impediment.
So let’s move on.
I don’t see the point of pretending to be something just because I WANT my blog to be read.
Yes I want you to read it…
…but I want you to appreciate the realness that comes with it.
If you can’t appreciate that, then this is obviously not for you…
Or then again you can close your eyes when you get to the cussing.
I say what I mean and mean what I say…..
….otherwise I won’t have a blog….
…my outlet…..
…my cesspit if you may because I dump all my shit here!
If I wrote any other way, trust me you would be bored.
Someone once said to me.
There is no structure in your writing…no paragraphs.
Your punctuation is all over the place.
What the fuck do I need paragraphs for if I’m MAD and I’m trying to make a point?
How do you want me to write please?
Today I would like to discuss, with my imaginary friends, an issue that has been bothering me since I was seven wee years old.
I do not appreciate the rampant felling of trees. Why is the world so callous? What have we done wrong?”

Yaaaaaaawn!
If I wanted to write about how people chopping down trees bugged me…
…trust me I would not go that route.
I’m not a journalist.
I don’t have to be polite about it because I don’t get paid for this shit.
This has been a PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCENT…..
…..which will lead to the real issue at hand.
Thank you as always for reading.

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MY BA3….YES BA3

March 6, 2011

So yes I haven’t blogged since January.
It’s March now so gosh I owe you guys.
This year, my resolution was to post on a regular basis but you know what???
My tolerance levels have shot up so things don’t piss me off so much!
Yeah………..
…….. that was a lie!
Truth?
My computer from which I blog (and yes I only blog on one particular computer) was going through some drama….
…..but we’re ok now.(whew!)
So lately Twitter is my best friend….
…..and I see a lot of blogworthy tweets everyday.
Today I would like to give a special thanks to the many people on Twitter who have made this piece possible.
Without you I would be nothing!
Nothing I tell you!
So its independence today!
Fantastic!
We’ve come a long way.
HI GHANA!!!!!!!!
No I’m NOT saying HI to Ghana!
That stands for “Happy Independence”…
In case you didn’t know….(of course I made it up!)
Now some of you will probably be going….
What the absolute fuck is HI GHANA!!!!!!
OOOOOKAAAAY!
Out the 35 of you who silently go……
“The fuck !!!”……
…..27 of you have typed these letters out on Facebook, Bbm, Whatsapp, Twitter and Text.
H.B.D!
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT PEOPLE!!!??????!!!????
What is wrong with you?
I mean REALLY???
Do you (secretly) hate me?? (could also be h8)
It’s my birthday…….
…..you claim you want to wish me well…..
….but you’re too lazy to type out Happy Birthday?
The fuck!
Take your birthday wishes! I don’t need them…!
I mean come on! How hard is it?
Not only do I get the impression you DIDN’T really wanna wish me well…..
….HBD DOES NOT in any way sound good.
You might as well stop singing “happy birthday to you”
And go “aych bee dee to you”
It sounds like a sexually transmitted disease of some sort…..
*crying* “ So the doctor said I have HBD. They have to amputate my penis”
….or something I should either be connecting to my TV or computer!
“Yeah so what are you saying? After I plug the HBD in, press the power button and the transmitter will be fully functional??”
Kwasiasem!
HBD!
The English language is slowly becoming obsolete.
Everything is being abbreviated.
I mean I get it.
We live in a fast world etc etc….
….but those abbreviations were made so u could text quickly.
If you’re trying to wish me a happy birthday quickly…..
….don’t wish it at all.
Birthday wishes aren’t meant to be rushed through.
For a lot of people birthdays are super special and friends and loved ones make it even more so…
…so if my boyfriend sent me HBD on my birthday…
…yeah he knows where he’ll be.
I mean imagine if you lost a loved one and I sent you a msg (message) that read…
….MC.
MC!!!!!
MC who? Lyte?
What has she got to do with anything???
By MC I meant My Condolences btw( by the way)
Or MAC!
What?
Mac Daddy?
Do I need to return your make-up?
My Absolute Condolences.
Yeah abbreviations are super handy …
(people who cannot spell to save their lives can hide behind them these days)
….but some,
highly inappropriate and insensitive. (my opinion as always)
And by the way….
….I don’t think these abbreviations are meant to be said.
They are for typing purposes only.
Imagine talking to someone who literally keeps saying…..
“lol”, “ikr” or “rotfl’
Roll on the damn floor and laugh then.
What are you waiting for?
What are you?
A fucktard?
Some abbreviations are just plain stupid.
You can’t just make the shit up and expect people to know what you are trying to say…
It MUST be universally accepted.
MDFSKKK is pretty awesome though I admit.
Love it.
Anyway I gotta go….
My ba3 is running low and I don’t have my charger….(took you a while to figure out huh?)
HBD GHANA!!!!!

Dedicated to the guy on Twitter who retweeted the other guy who typed ba3 as a short form of battery.